The Room Next Door

In August, Nia left for university. She packed two bags and a box of books. Her father drove her to the train station. Tobias stayed at home. He watched the car turn the corner.

Pada bulan Agustus, Nia pergi kuliah. Dia mengemas dua tas dan sekotak buku. Ayahnya mengantarnya dengan mobil ke stasiun kereta. Tobias tinggal di rumah. Dia memandangi mobil itu berbelok di tikungan.

Tobias was fifteen. He and Nia shared a wall all his life. Her room was next to his. At night, he often heard her laugh on the phone. In the morning, he heard her radio. Now there was only a thick, quiet wall.

Tobias berumur lima belas tahun. Seumur hidupnya, dia dan Nia berbagi satu dinding. Kamar Nia bersebelahan dengan kamarnya. Malam hari, dia sering mendengar Nia tertawa di telepon. Pagi hari, dia mendengar radionya. Sekarang hanya ada dinding tebal yang sunyi.

He walked into her room on the first night. It was strange. The bed was made. The desk was empty. The walls were light blue. Old tape left small marks. He sat on the floor and felt like a stranger.

Pada malam pertama, dia masuk ke kamar Nia. Rasanya aneh. Tempat tidurnya rapi. Mejanya kosong. Dindingnya berwarna biru muda. Bekas selotip meninggalkan tanda-tanda kecil. Dia duduk di lantai dan merasa seperti orang asing.

On the second night, he came again. He did not turn on the light. He lay on her bed and looked at the ceiling. It had a brown stain. It looked like a rabbit. Nia once told him she named it Gerald. "Hello, Gerald," he said. His voice sounded loud in the dark.

Pada malam kedua, dia datang lagi. Dia tidak menyalakan lampu. Dia berbaring di tempat tidur Nia dan menatap langit-langit. Ada noda cokelat di sana. Bentuknya seperti kelinci. Nia pernah bercerita bahwa dia menamainya Gerald. "Halo, Gerald," katanya. Suaranya terdengar keras dalam gelap.

On the third night, his mother found him there. She stood at the door with a laundry basket. "Tobias," she said.

Pada malam ketiga, ibunya menemukannya di sana. Ibunya berdiri di pintu sambil membawa keranjang cucian. "Tobias," katanya.

"What are you doing?"

"Kamu sedang apa?"

"Nothing," he said. She sat on the edge of the bed. She was quiet for a while.

"Tidak apa-apa," katanya. Ibunya duduk di tepi tempat tidur. Dia diam beberapa saat.

"I miss her too," she said.

"Ibu juga merindukannya," katanya.

"I do not miss her," said Tobias.

"Aku tidak merindukannya," kata Tobias.

"She was loud."

"Dia berisik."

"She was very loud," said his mother, and smiled. They sat together and said nothing. Then his mother cleared her throat.

"Dia berisik sekali," kata ibunya, lalu tersenyum. Mereka duduk bersama tanpa berkata apa-apa. Lalu ibunya berdeham.

"I want to talk about this room," she said.

"Ibu ingin bicara soal kamar ini," katanya.

"What about it?" said Tobias.

"Soal apa?" kata Tobias.

"Your father and I think about an office. We need a place for the computer. And the room is empty."

"Ayah dan Ibu memikirkan untuk menjadikannya kantor. Kita butuh tempat untuk komputer. Dan kamar ini kosong."

Tobias sat up. "An office?"

Tobias duduk tegak. "Kantor?"

"Only an idea," said his mother.

"Baru ide saja," kata ibunya.

"We do not decide yet." Tobias did not sleep that night. He stared at the wall between the two rooms. He thought of the blue paint. He thought of Gerald. He thought of Nia's voice. She always said, "Goodnight, Toby." He hated that name.

"Kami belum memutuskan." Tobias tidak tidur malam itu. Dia menatap dinding di antara kedua kamar. Dia memikirkan cat biru itu. Dia memikirkan Gerald. Dia memikirkan suara Nia. Kakaknya selalu berkata, "Selamat malam, Toby." Dia benci nama itu.

In the morning, he went to the kitchen. His father made coffee. His mother read the news on her phone. Tobias stood in the door with his arms crossed. "I have something to say," he said. They both looked at him.

Paginya, dia pergi ke dapur. Ayahnya membuat kopi. Ibunya membaca berita di ponselnya. Tobias berdiri di pintu dengan tangan terlipat. "Aku mau bilang sesuatu," katanya. Keduanya menoleh kepadanya.

"Please do not make it an office," said Tobias.

"Tolong jangan jadikan kamar itu kantor," kata Tobias.

"Not yet."

"Jangan dulu."

His father put down his cup. "Why not?"

Ayahnya meletakkan cangkirnya. "Kenapa tidak?"

"Because she comes home for the holidays," said Tobias.

"Karena Kak Nia pulang saat liburan," kata Tobias.

"And she needs a bed. And a desk. And her stuff."

"Dan dia butuh tempat tidur. Dan meja. Dan barang-barangnya."

"She can sleep in your room," said his father.

"Dia bisa tidur di kamarmu," kata ayahnya.

"She can sleep in her room," said Tobias. His voice was rough. He did not like the sound of it. "It is her room. She should not come home and find a computer there." His parents were quiet. His mother looked at his father. His father looked at the floor. For a moment, nobody spoke.

"Dia bisa tidur di kamarnya sendiri," kata Tobias. Suaranya serak. Dia tidak suka mendengarnya. "Itu kamarnya. Dia tidak boleh pulang lalu menemukan komputer di sana." Orang tuanya diam. Ibunya menatap ayahnya. Ayahnya menatap lantai. Beberapa saat tidak ada yang bicara.

"Tobias," said his mother, very gently.

"Tobias," kata ibunya, dengan sangat lembut.

"She will not live here again. Not the same way. That is how it is when children grow up."

"Dia tidak akan tinggal di sini lagi. Tidak seperti dulu. Begitulah kalau anak-anak sudah dewasa."

"I know that," he said. He looked at the table. His eyes were wet, and he was angry about it.

"Aku tahu itu," katanya. Dia menatap meja. Matanya basah, dan dia marah karenanya.

"I know. But not yet."

"Aku tahu. Tapi jangan dulu."

His mother stood up and put her arms around him. He was taller than her now. But he put his head on her shoulder. His father came and put a hand on his back. "All right," said his father.

Ibunya berdiri dan memeluknya. Dia sudah lebih tinggi daripada ibunya sekarang. Tapi dia menyandarkan kepala di bahu ibunya. Ayahnya datang dan meletakkan tangan di punggungnya. "Baiklah," kata ayahnya.

"We leave the room for now."

"Kita biarkan kamar itu seperti itu dulu."

"For how long?" asked Tobias.

"Sampai kapan?" tanya Tobias.

"Until the holidays," said his mother. "Then we ask her." That night, Tobias went into the room again. This time, he turned on the light. He picked up a pen from the desk. He drew a small rabbit near the door. It was a bad rabbit. It had one long ear.

"Sampai liburan," kata ibunya. "Lalu kita tanya dia." Malam itu, Tobias masuk ke kamar itu lagi. Kali ini, dia menyalakan lampu. Dia mengambil pulpen dari meja. Dia menggambar kelinci kecil di dekat pintu. Kelincinya jelek. Telinganya hanya satu dan panjang.

He took out his phone. He wrote a message to Nia. He wrote it, deleted it, and wrote it again. At last, he sent a short one. Gerald misses you. A reply came in two minutes. Tell him I come home in December. And Toby, I miss the wall too.

Dia mengeluarkan ponselnya. Dia menulis pesan untuk Nia. Dia menulisnya, menghapusnya, dan menulisnya lagi. Akhirnya, dia mengirim pesan yang pendek. Gerald kangen kamu. Balasan datang dua menit kemudian. Bilang padanya aku pulang bulan Desember. Dan Toby, aku juga kangen dinding itu.